Here are a dozen short insights into the life and mind of the ASM. Please feel free to correspond with comments, suggestions, and thoughts regarding the material.

1. Average Income to Survive
2. Baggage
3. Cheating
4. Taking for granted
5. Hook Up
6. Long Term Relationship
7. Love at First Site
8. I have changed
9. Maintenace
10. Choosing a Mate
11. Ménage a tois threesome or multiple partners

12. Basics of Wine

Average Income to Survive

The items listed below are the basic expenses an ASM needs to survive.

Expenses Average Cost

• Rent $400
• Utilities $80
• Phone $50
• Car Payment $200
• Car Insurance $50
• Food $200
• Dating $240
• Clothes $30
• Gas $60
• Credit Cards $80
• Micelaneous $200

Total Net Pay $1,590

Add in the difference for taxes and the gross salary is about $26,400 per year. In the area I currently reside, rent is at lease double the figure above and much of the other costs are higher as well. Add in a student loan, a previous marriage, kids, pets, high maintenance dates or a nice car, and many single males would need at least a $45,000 a year job to manage a meager existence.

Baggage

When an ASM says the word "baggage," he is referring to an undesirable emotional, mental, or other trait his partner, friend, or date possesses. Many people associate baggage with children and this is absolutely false. The term baggage could be an ex-lover, marital status, pet, credit debt, living situation, employment status, transportation problems, previous abuse, or an unusual physical trait.

Cheating

Cheating is more than just the sexual acts. It is the path leading to the intimate contact. Cheating usually does not spontaneously happen, it is a planned activity where the art of deception is perfected and used to manipulate. Some overly jealous persons may consider flirting as a form of cheating, but this is only true if the activity leads to dishonest sexual relations.

Taking for granted

This is the most common complaint among females regarding their mates. A few examples of taking for granted are; not coming home, not appreciating/acknowledging efforts, not calling, not refilling the bathroom tissue roll, forgetting "special dates," not cleaning up after yourself, and the constant changing of plans. Becoming more considerate, learning to respect, and enhancing communication skills will improve most relationship issues. Click here for Three Keys to Relationships

Hook Up

ASM's only use the term hook up when they have had sexual penetration. It could be oral, vaginal, or anal. A kiss, a date, a hug, or any other form of non-penetration is not hooking up. On the other side, some women believe that hooking up could be a dance, a date for coffee, or even a passing conversation.

Long Term Relationship

For the ASM and most women, a LTR is any relationship that has endured at least six months. It is at this critical point when awkward questions regarding commitment and marriage usually arise.

Love at First Site

In very rare cases, this does exist and the relationship prospers. Love at First Site could be compared to the lottery, the odds are low, but occasionally someone wins. Notice the acronym is LAFS. You are most likely experiencing a lustful desire for a sexual encounter. The reality of relationships is that 50% of all first marriages end in divorce and over 60% of second marriages do as well. What do these statistics tell us? If a person had a failed marriage before, it will probably fail again-people are still marrying the idiots that failed before. Think before you leap.

I have changed

How many of us have tried to maintain a relationship with the convincing cry of "I've changed"? Or were you the person on the other end, listening and finally agreeing? In either case, looking back on these pitiful irrational moments reinforces our cynicism. People will change to accommodate a partners request, but will eventually fall back into their old habits.

Maintenance Issues

Low Maintenance means the person does not need much attention or have an excessive materialistic nature.

High maintenance people require attention, material possessions, and could be considered selfish, greedy, and whiny. Life revolves around the high maintenance person. A person who I may classify as high maintenance may be considered moderate or low maintenance to someone else. It is a personal preference and level of tolerance.

Choosing a Mate

The ASM will spend hours, weeks, and even months searching for the best tools, toys, and vehicles to fit his needs. We will research Consumer Reports, the Net, and ask for references regarding price, warranty, and quality of the specific product.

The situation changes drastically as we shop for prospective companions. We will go to a bar, party, or other meeting place to hunt for our fix to quench our sexual thirst. Physical appeal will hypnotize us. If drugs and alcohol are being used, they will cloud our better judgment.

The bottom line is the ASM does not seek out a history report, mental examination, or criminal record when seaching through his latest purchases and wonder, did I use it last night, is it going to stay a while, and did I use it correctly. This is completely different when the ASM needs physical companionship. Why?

When our dick needs attention we go to a bar and end up with whatever, whomever we can get.

Ménage a tois threesome or multiple partners

This seems to be a dominating fantasy amongst men and women. After extensive thought, I actually don't know if I could follow through with it. If I had more than one woman at a time, I can imagine myself becoming overwhelmed and confused with all of the options. I would have too many questions darting through my mind.